Happy Birthday, JT

Four years old! I can't believe JT is 4 years old today.

I also think about S today. I wonder if she thinks of JT. If she starts getting anxious for our pictures and letter as we send them around the end of July. Is she OK with her decision. Is she happy with how we are raising JT? Will she ever want to meet us?

So many questions go through my mind but I just concentrate on watching JT have the time of his life on his birthday.

We went and saw Toy Story 3 today. Great movie!! JT was enthralled. He loved it. We opened presents had tacos for supper and had a Toy Story cake with ice cream. He is now tucked in bed with his new toys close at hand. (Like the new Cars laptop from A&B).

I am exhausted and ready for bed.

I love this house!!

I'm sitting here at our kitchen table doing some work on my laptop. I missed work yesterday and will miss work again Friday afternoon for A's sisters wedding. So I wanted to make up as much time as I can without having to use vacation. I'm sitting here working away when someone knocked on the door and rang the bell

Let me interrupt and ask, who does that? Pick one, ring the bell or knock. Don't do both. Oh and the knock was the infamous da dada da da duh duh. Really who does that on some one's door? OK ranting done.

I have two rules about answering my front door; 1.If we're expecting friends I'll answer it and 2.I don't have to answer it if I don't want to.

And tonight I don't want to because we aren't expecting anyone and plus the knock and doorbell gave me the willies. None of our friends do that.

And the reason I love this house. I didn't have to and they didn't know we are home because the window doesn't look into our whole house like the other house did. I have sat on my couch and had some weird old man looking in my front door window ringing the bell at our old house motioning me to answer it (JT wasn't home). Just because he could see me doesn't mean I have to answer it. I did not feel safe watching TV at night in our old house. Even if I had the lights off someone could see me sitting in the livingroom. In this house if they look in they'll see a wall with hooks and coats on it. Ha!

LOVE IT!

P.S. 4 1/2 more days until the consult!

My coworker and I were talking yesterday about Heaven and what will be. She has Cerebral Palsy that affects her legs. She has gone through so much in her life just to be able to walk. And walk she does.

We were talking about the joy of heaven and she was telling me a conversation she and her daughter had about her legs; how in heaven she'll be able to walk. She said she is so excited because she will be able to be 'normal'. What a feeling it would be to be able to walk around heaven.

I hated to disagree with her but I said 'P. you won't be walking in heaven.' She looked at me and said 'Yes I will.' I told her 'I have a feeling you will be too busy running and dancing to walk.' She beamed and said 'How wonderful that would be!'

This conversation got me thinking about my scar. I have a nice white scar running down the middle of my chest from my open heart surgery when I was 2 1/2. I love my scar. I proudly show it off. I think people who don't have scars look weird. It's something that has literally always been with me. The only people who have seen me before it are my parents and older siblings. I can't fathom what I'll look like once I get to heaven. I told my coworker I would probably ask God for a mirror and I won't be able to tear myself from it.

My coworker said I can have her seat at God's table in heaven, she won't need it she'll be too busy running, and I can put my mirror on it and stare at my perfect chest.

Can't wait.

Bored - B.O.R.E.D

I grew up in a house where my mom was a stay at home mom. Great, huh? Sure. But she watched TV ALL day. ALL DAY! While my siblings and I went outside and played she would be inside watching TV. After supper, she'd be inside watching TV. When we had to come in, we'd all sit and watch TV. Saturday's she'd be inside watching TV. When we would go on 'vacation' for the weekend (it was all my parents could afford) at a resort a couple hours away, my mom would spend the whole time in the room watching TV. I was bored then and am bored now.

I'm all for lazy days and quiet weekends, don't get me wrong. I do enjoy quiet time and mundane TV. I do have my favorites that I watch. TC has been on overtime the past couple months. At night it's just JT and I and he goes to bed at 7pm. I know some people wonder why not have him stay up later. The answer is he needs his sleep. He is an early bird (even if he goes to bed at 8pm or 9pm) and if he is up later he is Mr Crankypants the next morning.

This leads me to a long night of TV watching. And I'm getting bored. I'm not going to spend every night cleaning my house from top to bottom just to stay busy. I'm trying to find things to do at night. I'm going to find out and see if I can work overtime at home (we got approved to work overtime at work) since I can't stay late. If I can't, I'm wondering if there's anything I could do to make money those few hours a night. I'm wondering how I can make money with my blog. We're starting the IVF process and I'm sure it'll be great entertainment once I start giving myself shots. I just don't have a clue where to start. It's hard to know what is a scam and what actually works.

I guess I'll just keep looking. If you have any suggestions what I could be doing leave a comment and let me know.

Love it!

I'm not one to watch a commercial on TV and have to buy the product. That's just not me. I may be intrigued but I won't actually go out and buy it.

This time I did. One night last week I was watching TV and there was a commercial for shampoo, Pantene, and two words caught my eye; Medium-Thick. Me having VERY thick and frizzy hair this caught my attention. I have been looking for the 'right' shampoo since college. When my thick but straight (and slightly manageable) hair went frizzy and wavy. That was 10 years ago. I literally ran to the store today and bought the shampoo and conditioner. They have a new line out and one of them is designed for people with medium thick hair. I bought the shampoo and conditioner and also the straighten and smooth creme.

I did the ultimate test. The most unthinkable thing I now dread doing with my hair (but was able to do in highschool). I blew dry my hair. Yep just grabbed a brush and used my fingers to blow dry. I added the creme to my wet head before drying. And OH MY GOSH! My hair is still thick but it was NOT this huge poof ball that it usually is after blow drying.

I AM IN LOVE!! Too bad I have a full bottle of my other shampoo and conditioner left to use. Maybe I could sneak them into TC's bottles and have him use them up. :)

Hello Summer

After a brief and cold Spring summer has sprung upon us. The sun, green grass, long days, and of course the heat. And if your a mom there's also sand in the shorts. Sigh. I picked up JT from the babysitter's today and he was covered head to toe (literally, it was in his hair) in sand. I was cleaning him up and noticed when the shorts fell on the ground that sand soon followed. Yuck. He got one long hot shower and we got about 1 inch of water on the floor. It's tough trying to lean into the shower to scrub him down and get everything off.

I wouldn't say I'm a neat freak but I dislike dirt. Dislike seeing kids walking around with snot running down their nose with dirty hands and faces. It's just something I have trouble grasping. And now I have one of those kids. I suppose it's because he's a boy and as a girl I wasn't one to get that dirty. I just need to get used to it, right?

Although on the bright side...only 5 more months until colder weather is here. :) Remember I LOVE the cold, love sleeve shirts, jackets, and soft scarves and hats, winter boats and cold nights. I'm also VERY excited to put the Christmas tree up in our new house. I can't wait to see it twinkling in front of our livingroom window.

Ok ok, I'm back to the bugs and the heat.

It's our decision

As most kids count down to the end of the school year I am counting down to when JT starts preschool the end of Aug. A little over 3 months and he'll be in school.

While buying a piano on Saturday, the salesman saw the city we live in and asked how the school district is. I said huge. It's 2 cities with LOTS of kids. He said but the area feels and looks like a small town. I agree. It does have the small farm town feel and that's why we love this area.

A coworker and I were talking about JT starting school and I mentioned how many people have mentioned how smart he is. She asked about our school district and how they should have programs for him if he is an advanced learner. I also told her the district is huge and I worry about him getting lost. Not lost in the school but lost in the system.

Our decision is this, JT (and all future kids) will be going to private school. They will be going to school at our church and God willing to the high school I graduated from (which is a school supported by our church's synod). This decision was fairly simple. TC and I both went to grade school through our church's. TC went to a public highschool and I to a private highschool. We want our children to be nurtured everyday in God's Word. I know the standards the teachers hold.

This is our decision. So why do I feel I have to defend it? Why do people turn up their noses when they hear 'Private School'. TC admitted to me his preceived idea of a private school kid. You know the Preppy dressed kid driving the BMW off to lacrosse. Wrong. When I hear of a private school kid who goes to a Christian school I think of a teenager going through the tough years with teachers who when a student approaches him/her they take out their Bible and pray. They aren't hindered by what the government says. I know the teachers hold the same values I do in how they live their lives. I know that JT will be able to know ALL his classmates. I graduated 8th grade with a class of 6. I walked along with 74 of my fellow senior classmates as we graduated in 1997. I loved going to my 10 year highschool reunion knowing everyone. TC went to his 10 year highschool reunion and had people talking to him he didn't even realize were in his class.

And again, this may not be most people's choice for their kids, but it is ours and we are happy with it.

Motivation

I love this blogging roller coaster. I write pretty regularly and then I don't. Then I'm up writing and then it dries up. It's pretty hard keeping up with the writing when only 3 people, if that, check in. That's even including the few I have no idea who they are. I have one person who comes up as unknown and that's pretty scary. I just looked and someone from Australia and Canada checked. I understand Australia as it came from my friend's blog but Canada? They actually had to know my blog address. I don't know anyone in Canada. I know people who may go to Canada but they don't know my blog address and it isn't published.

I suppose I should just be happy someone's logging on. Although in this day and age I worry about hackers and not so nice people. So I had removed our pictures from the side. Just for my sanity. I didn't have a watermark on them and I don't want people copying them and using them to their discretion.

So hopefully soon I'll get motivated again to write. Until then enjoy this beautiful weather (if your in MN) we have coming.

Family Vacations

Ever since TC and I got married we always talked about what we would do for family vacations. That one special trip once (or twice) a year. While growing up my family would visit this resort in Western MN every Spring and then every Fall. Money was hard to come by so we were only there for the weekend. We always had a blast (even if my mom just sat in our hotel room all weekend and watch TV, sigh). TC's family would drive somewhere every year.

Sure we could keep going up North and stay at Eagle Ridge in Lutsen MN. We've done it a few times and will keep doing it. But it's hard when most of his family still live in that area. When they find out we are going up there they expect us to go visit. Honestly, we are on vacation. Don't get me wrong we love them and will happily take a weekend and make that our main agenda to visit all his family members up there. We have a blast every time but want something JT (and future kids) can remember as that special once a year vacation with our little family.

TC got an email from his uncle last week that said he won a free stay at this, well I don't know what to call it. They have cabins on a lake and you can fish or even hunt. It's in Canada and very beautiful. His uncle has been here before and loves it. TC was looking at their website and saw that you can rent cabin (with all necessities, laundry, running water and housekeeping etc) that sleeps 6 for a week for around $300. Now that's a steal! We talked about it and how fun would it be to go up there and fish. Hang out on the dock and watch the sunrise and sunset.

So we decided next year will be our first year. We are SO excited! TC will be getting his passport soon for his trip this year with his uncle (which is over July 4th weekend). JT and I will get ours sometime in the near future.

I'm so excited to start this new family tradition. The memories that will be created will be wonderful. Can you see us sitting in a boat watching JT catch a fish? Going to the cabin to fry it up for supper, then sit in front of a fire and talk and enjoy nature.

I can't wait!

Been a bit busy

Wow, these past few weeks have been a bit busy. Things are slowing down and I'm grateful for that. We had a wonderful Easter. Went to A & B's house where our friend's daughter thought it would be fun for JT to look for Easter eggs. It was gorgeous outside and he had a blast looking for the Easter eggs.

It was fun listening to JT talk to friends at church about what the Easter bunny gave him. (We don't dwell on the Easter bunny. Well actually we haven't talked about the Easter bunny. We believe Easter is more about the rising of Christ and not a bunny.) Well I overheard a friend ask JT if the Easter bunny came and JT said NO. That is true he didn't come but he did find his Easter basket. Another friend asked if Easter bunny came and again JT said NO and they said well maybe he'll come after church. I guess we'll need to let JT know that people will ask but he doesn't visit our house.

Work is stressful. Many layoff's, budget cuts, and more work than one person really should take on. It's suppose to be getting better and I hope so. I hope it's sooner rather than later.

Well I'm going to spend time with TC. Sorry to cut this short. I wanted to jump in and let you all know we are here.

9 wonderful years!

Nine years ago today TC and I said I DO. It was a cold, sunny, with a hint of snow, exciting, and exhausting day. People say you forget your wedding day. Well you at least don't remember most of it. I remember a lot of it. I remember the DJ not having our songs, TC's car filled with packaging peanuts, how he looked in his white tux and the look on his face the first time he saw me. I remember all the pictures that were taken, how I wanted my bouquet to be bigger, how our pastor forgot to announce us as the new Mr and Mrs. I also remember how we both got shorted on our wedding cake and only got a tiny piece while our guests got these huge pieces.

But the most important thing I remember is the foundation our marriage is set on. God's Word and faithfulness. He is number one, we are second. The trust and respect for eachother and knowing that TC will be there with me no matter what. I love him with all my heart and am looking forward to another 100 years with this wonderful man.

Conversations with JT

We were getting ready to make supper tonight and TC was asking me if I would cook the asparagus. This is how the conversation unfolded.

TC (speaking to me): Can I trust you to cook these? (He was holding the bag of asparagus)

ME: Are you sure you can trust me with those?

JT: You can trust me that I'm not going to eat those.


JT got sent to the corner and I got a stern look from TC because I was laughing so hard.

Wheat

So I talked to some coworkers (who are RN's) and friends about JT's lab results and the doctor mentioning possibly removing wheat from his diet. They all said the same thing. If he has a wheat allergy wouldn't this show up sooner? And wouldn't he still have diarrhea and stomach pains? His stools are pretty much normal now and he doesn't complain about his stomach hurting all day like he use too.

What to do, what to do. I have asked JT if his stomach hurts after eating certain food (mostly those with wheat, like his bagels, peanut butter sandwiches, and noodles). Each time I listed one he said no his stomach did hurt after he ate those. He did mention that his stomach would hurt if he ate a lot of candy and I agreed with him.

The doctor said we should know pretty quickly if we remove wheat if the symptoms go away. But he no longer has symptoms! How are we to know if that's the problem when there's nothing to watch.

It's time like this I wish we knew the answer right away.

Wheat?? Or No Wheat...

That is the question.

So JT's lab tests came back negative. Except wheat stood out in the RAST test. But according to his doctor it's not a conclusive test and we should try removing wheat from his diet to see if his symptoms improve. He also suggested seeing an allergist and get a skin allergy test done as that's more trustworthy.

So we remove wheat from his diet. And he eats what? Wheat is in EVERYTHING. OK not everything but it sure seems like it. When I cook we're either having pasta as a side or pasta as the main course or wheat in the cereal or bread for lunch or supper. I am at a loss on what to cook now. Should I let him eat a banana and yogurt all the time since that's all he seems to want? I have no idea where to go. What else to make as a side dish besides mashed potatoes and rice.

No more Slowly Deviled Beef WITH buttered noodles
No more Rotini pasta with meatballs and spaghetti sauce and twisty bread
No more pancakes
No more cookies
No more cakes or cupcakes
No more bread
No more Pillsbury Cinnamon Rolls
No more fettuccine Alfredo
No more Chicken nuggets with macaroni and cheese (and broccoli) JT's FAVORITE meal
No more pizza
I'm sure most crackers out there have wheat in them too
And who knows what else I'm missing right now.

What in the world am I going to make now for him to eat that will fill him up? It's bad enough he's hungry an hour after he eats. I need something with substance. And something that has food that I can find at a 'normal' grocery store. Why do most wheat free recipes have ingredients that require you needing a passport to obtain them? I want something easy that doesn't require 600 ingredients and 4 hours to cook.

My thoughts on the Health Care Bill

Ugh...

That's all I have to say about that.

Boys vs Girls

Today JT and I went to his friend L's house. They both go to the same daycare and are the best of buds. It went well given the fact they are young. But wow, the differences stood out.

I love visiting with my friend's especially those who have girls. Of course our house is littered with cars, trucks, trains, and lots of activity. L's room was full of pink, tinker bell, and lots of frilly stuff. JT someone managed to find the only 'boy' toys she had. Which of course were Barbie cars, motorcycles, and a couple baby toys he use to have too. He did find a couple trains and a car to play with and pretty much had those glued to his hand most of the afternoon.

L wanted to put stickers on this jewelry box she got as a birthday gift. JT did not. L wanted to color. JT did not. L wanted JT to play a game with her. That lasted for 30 seconds. L wanted to play in her tinkerbell tent. JT did...he was inside pushing the walls down so it would fall over. L was NOT happy. Of course they fought a few times. That's to be expected for a 4 year old and an almost 4 year old.

I'm all for JT having friends who are girls. But after watching the different personalities I'm wondering if maybe we should wait before having another get together (with a girl). We couldn't leave those two alone to play as JT won't sit down and play (And L was getting pretty frustrated). When JT is around other boys I can let him play and he'll be fine. He is active like other boys and they usually are banging cars and trucks around. He isn't interested in sitting still for a game, or coloring for a long period of time. I don't want him to feel like I'm forcing him to play with someone, even if it is a friend, when his personality isn't wired to sit still and play quietly.

I'm at a loss on what to do.

Joys of blogging

I received an email a few days ago from a company that says it has revolutionized the birth experience. In this email the writer (I'm guessing the owner) proceeds to mention how I'm like most women who know the pain of labor and delivery can be worrisome.

Um...have you read my blog or are you just looking for free advertising? Oh! I see it's the latter. Because my son is adopted!

I truly understand if I was to meet this person in real life she wouldn't know. And in all honesty I may even listen to her pitch and if it sounds interesting and helpful may pass it on to my friends who are pregnant. But this is a blog. My life is out there. I don't hide my son is adopted. I may even share the link of the company for other's who happen to find my blog and might be interested.

Instead you all get a ranting post from me on people not taking the time to actually read a blog before asking for something for free. Very annoying.

Hello antibiotics

Yesterday afternoon I received a call from my friend who watches JT during the day. Actually I missed the call and will go into that reason later. But JT had a fever of 103. Off to urgent care we went and he was diagnosed with a double ear infection. Ugh. Poor thing. Got one round of antibiotics in him before bed last night. Then he and I were up for about 2 hours while his fever spiked. Poor thing was miserable. I was able to rock him to sleep and this morning he woke up chipper and happy and fever free. Yahoo! He has been fever free all day. He does have a pretty wet cough and sometimes I can hear the gunk in his chest. I'm hoping the antibiotics will clear that up too since he has a runny nose and that's probably the culprit.

OK, back to why I missed my friend's call. Two of my coworkers were told their jobs were eliminated yesterday. Two other departments are going through the same thing. Our environmental services manager was laid off and the lead housekeeper. It's tough to see our friends and great coworkers go. Today was a down right crappy day. I have more work on top of my already heavy work load. I just cannot get done what I need to when the added on work is pouring in. I'm close to hysterics and tears. It's so overwhelming I feel myself shutting down.

A fellow medical biller at one of the hospitals here in the cities told me the perfect analogy on how I feel. I feel like a dog in a room full of bouncing balls. There's so many I don't know which one to grab and stand there watching.

We have a busy weekend this weekend and all I really want to do is stay in my pj's and watch movies all weekend. Then we're busy every night next week. I really hope I don't explode.

Life and everything in it

Can we get a break? A break from sicknesses that is. Last night I woke up. I wasn't sure what woke me up and then I heard it. I couldn't quite tell what I heard and thought I made it up. Then I heard it again, the seal bark. TJ has a cough. I was worried. We needed to get up early to play handbells at church. I would have contemplated staying home with him even if we had to play but we already had 3 people who wouldn't be there today. Sigh. Luckily the cough wasn't constant.

We all woke up and he seemed fine minus the occasional cough. And he didn't have a fever. We also had a fun filled afternoon planned with his friend from daycare. He missed her birthday party a month ago because he was sick and I didn't want him to miss today too.

I put him down for nap early hoping he would get a good 2 hours in before we had to leave. A hour later I was folding clothes in my and TC's room when the door opened. A sleepy, tousled hair little boy with THE pinkest cheeks I've seen walked into the room. CRAP. I took his temp and the thermometer had a sad face and was flashing FEVER. Double crap.

Can he really have a break? With his stomach issues, and nonstop colds can we have a few months without being sick? A call to my friend, we rescheduled to next Saturday, and a call out to our friend A & B and they will watch TJ tomorrow so if whatever he has won't go around daycare.

Hopefully TC and I won't get this either. I can't miss anymore work.

Flirty Aprons

Aren't these the cutest apron's you've ever seen?! I'm trying to decide if I would actually wear one when I bake and cook.

I just showed TC the apron I want and he made the comment 'I do hope that's all you're wearing when you get it.' I think these people may be onto something. ;)

By the way they are having a sale until Sunday the 28th. Enter 30Coupon for 30% off your order. Not bad!

Saddest thing I've ever heard

JT and I got home yesterday and he was asking for a snack.  I was making goulash and normally he’ll eat half a can of kidney beans.  I asked him if he wanted some kidney beans and he said NO he wanted a treat (candy).  I said No candy and the tears flowed.  I let him cry for a bit and asked if he wanted a granola bar.  He was still crying.  He looked up at me, said NO and kept crying.  I sent him to his room to calm down (and so I wouldn’t lose my mind).  While he was in there I could hear him singing,

 

The itsty (sniff) bitsy spider (sniff) went up the water spout (some more crying), down came the rain and… (and by now he is full out crying).

 

I couldn’t take it any more and went in there and snuggled with him for a little bit.  He calmed down and ate his granola bar and then 2 bowls of goulash with extra kidney beans. 

 

Its one thing seeing your child hurt but hearing the itsty bitsty spider in between tears is the saddest thing ever.

Needs some updating...

As I'm starting to write more again on my blog I'm realizing that my blog needs some updating. Unfortunately the pocketbook is telling me the blog design needs to wait but I've been thinking of changing our blog names. Something more unique for all of us. Mommy and Daddy seem to generic. This is a task I thought would be easy. Yep, it's not. This is probably why I stuck with Mommy and Daddy and Little Man.

After much thinking (it's been months) I've hit on some names on our family makeup. We are a musical family. Daddy and I play the trumpet and sing (as you all know we are in our church choir and play handbells), I also play the piano and Little Man has been singing since he was an infant and is eager to start trumpet lessons. So, without further ado, here are our new blog names:

Daddy = The Conductor - TC
Mommy = Harmony
Little Man = Jr. Tenor - JT

Hoping to add, a soprano, alto, and bass in the near future. :)

This is going to get some getting use to isn't it?

Quiet Day

This has been a pretty relaxing weekend. We had no major plans and pretty much everything in the house is in it's (new) spot. I am still looking for the camera cord, one of my pictures that has the Lord's Prayer on it, and my jewelry box. How do you lose a jewelry box?! I think it's packed in a box but I thought all the boxes were unpacked. It may be in the garage, although I really hope it isn't.

Daddy got the kitchen cleaned out and there aren't any boxes or bags in the dining room any more. Yahoo! He also cleaned off the papers on the counter and table. I really wish I could find the camera cord so I can post pictures.

The snow is melting off of our driveway and I noticed it's a cement driveway and not asphalt (did I spell that right?). Nice. I can't wait for the rest of the snow to melt so Little Man can play outside. I suppose that would require warmer weather and I wish for that too.

On Feb 17th I had my one year anniversary at my job. I can't believe it's been a year. That year has flown by. I have gone from being extremely confused in my job to taking on all the Medicare billing, and soon will be learning HMO therapy billing to help with that (you know that means the person in that position will be let go...but shhhh you didn't hear that from me). I have my 1 year review on March 1st. I'm not nervous or anxious about it because my boss has told me multiple times how much they appreciate the work I do. She has also mentioned how the board of directors are noticing the money coming in. In this economy a little bit helps. The one thing I'm wondering about is if I'm getting a raise. I would love a raise. In most places I would say I know I would be getting a raise. But in the health care industry, especially Long Term Care, money is lacking, jobs are being cut, and we are pinching every penny. We have furlough days we are required to take once a month. So that is why I am wondering if I get a raise. It would be nice if I did but I completely understand if I don't.

A Potty?

Little Man and I went to Target yesterday. I decided to get him some Kandoo flushable wipes so he can wipe himself in the bathroom since he wants to be so independent.

We get it home, I put it in the bathroom, open it and show Little Man how to use it. He starts opening and closing it and laughing and I told him not to do that as it will break it. He laughs and said 'He wants to show me somethim (something)'. I said OK. He opened it, laughs, and said 'Look! It looks like a potty!'

I do have to admit with the lid open the Kandoo container does in fact look like a potty.

Still working at it

Little Man is potty trained. He keeps his underwear clean and dry and let's me know whe he needs to go (for the most part. Mr. Independant likes to go to the bathroom by himself these days.). We have been keeping him in a pullup at night because he still pees in it. Right before we moved I told Little Man as soon as we move to the house we are going to do a night with his underwear with a plastic over it. This is what he wears for nap (and actually doesn't at daycare) so why not at night? If he gets water at night it's a sip. So tonight we are trying. I will let you know if I need to do a boat load of laundry to wash his sheets, blankets, stuffed animals and himself.

Hopefully I don't spend the night awake worrying he'll wet through.

School

In 6 months and a few days Little Man starts preschool. We went to church tonight for Ash Wednesday and there in our box, just as our pastor's wife and preschool/kindergarten teacher promised, was the application paperwork. Little Man saw the big envelope and asked what was in it. I told him the paperwork to sign him up for preschool next year. You should have heard the squeal of pure joy come from him. He is SO excited! He has been looking forward to going to school since last year when we went to the open house. (We didn't go this year as we couldn't take the time off.)

He is growing up so fast. I'm excited for him to start school. It's a little bittersweet but a happy bittersweet. He's a great little boy. Smart, sweet, funny, talkative and out right cute. I look forward to seeing how he does in school. Will he continue to be a follower or learn to be his own person? Will we be called in to talk to his teacher because he talks to much or will he be quiet and reserved when he needs to be? Will I be bawling as I watch him sing in the Christmas program? Full of pride for my Little Man and all he is doing in life. Will he work hard at his schoolwork or will we need to be on his case to get it done? Will he have problems learning or will he be ahead of the class? Or will he be smack dab in the middle? Will he have lots of friends? Any friends? Will he like piano lessons when he starts them in a few years?

Those are the questions we parents ask ourselves. It's the joy of being a parent to see those questions being answered as our children grow up. Sometimes the answers are wonderful and sometimes the answers need a little more work and a lot of patience. That is the joy of parenting. It isn't easy but the reward of the success of our children is what makes it worthwhile.

A sibling

Little Man needs a sibling...BAD. If we're in the 'baby's' room he'll ask me if he can play with 'her' when she isn't in the crib. The toys in the room are also 'her's'. He has also been saying his teddy bear is his sister the past few weeks. I try to tell him that his teddy isn't his sister. He doesn't have a sister yet but he always argues that teddy is indeed his sister.

Here is another issue, a sister. Not a brother, but a sister. I keep telling him it is up to God to bless us with a baby boy or girl. I tell him if he really would like a sister he needs to pray to God and ask for one. He will fold his hands and with my help pray for a sister (I of course, wouldn't have him full out pray for a sister but if it's in God's will he would like a sister.).

But this has me thinking. Should we go for it and check we only want a girl on our adoption paperwork? I know we can choose and we (OK, me) chose that we really shouldn't choose between a boy and girl but leave it up to God. But Daddy REALLY wants a daughter this time around (And no, we do not talk about this with Little Man. He has done all this sister wanting on his own.).

Is this God's way of saying our next child is a girl? That we should go for it and only check girl? I fear that if we do we'll be waiting another 2 years. I don't know if I can handle that long of a wait again.

I am unsure what to do. If I had my way I would have started the process (Ok, fine, I would be pregnant) months ago...

Too tired

I have tried for the past hour to write a post. I log in and... That's pretty much as far as I get. I'm exhausted. I'm amazed at how exhausted I get early in the night. I can barely make it to 9pm most nights. I could lay my head down right now and fall asleep.

I just re-read the last paragraph and I can't believe how many typos and grammar erros I had in it. See, I am exhausted.

Before I go I'll tell you about Little Man's day. I brought soy milk in a sippy cup with us to his babysitter's so he could have it with his cereal and for lunch if he had any left. 'A' picked him up tonight so I could drop the keys off to our apartment and she said S said that Little Man had diarrhea, very runny, today. Well I guess soy milk is out of the questions. I had a friend tell how harsh soy milk could be and well it doesn't agree with Little Man. So I got him some rice milk and I hope tomorrow is a better day for him and S.

Wow, I really can't keep my eyes open. I'll end here and write more later.

Good night.

A goodbye

Goodbye to our dearest apartment. We finished cleaning it out today and tomorrow I will hand in our keys.

As I was walking through I am amazed and humbled at how God has blessed us. In a time of great need he blessed us with a place that was quiet (for the most part) and pretty spacious. The bedrooms were huge compared to most apartments and we had 2 bathrooms (we didn't have that at our old house). And we had a washer and dryer in our unit.

I'm glad Little Man was pretty young when we moved in. A few of our neighbors loved to try new things, ah hem, smoke something that is not a cigarette. It took a year for Little Man to ask what that smell is. (I started replying 'That smell is the reason we are moving.)

It wasn't easy living in the apartment. I started feeling clastrophobic a few months ago and really was having a hard time even being in the kitchen. It was closed in and didn't have windows, let alone space.

I'm grateful we found such a pretty nice place. We could have been somewhere not so safe for Little Man. One place we were inches from signing when Daddy looked at me and said 'I can't do this.' It was in a duplex and our other 4 neighbors were bachelors. We feared there would be nightly parties. Luckily we made that decision as a few months later the same unit we were going to sign on caught fire.

It was pretty nice to go through a summer and not have to worry about mowing and watering the lawn. Most of the winter we didn't have to worry about shoveling the driveway.

But as I sit in our upstairs livingroom, exhausted and sweaty from vacuuming the whole upstairs and basement, I am thankful. Thankful we have to mow again and shovel (as we are expecting 2 inches tonight). Thankful that smell in my house is due to having viles of poo in Little Man's bathroom and not from something someone smoked.

So again, thank you apartment for being there when we needed you.

Adoption and health

Adoption is our life. It's how our family is growing. We love adoption. We breathe adoption.

But it doesn't mean it's easy.

Little Man is our son. Our pride and joy. Then he gets sick and we take him to the doctor. And the doctor asks 'Is there family history of ...?' It's right then when I crawl into myself and sheepishly say 'He's adopted. We don't know anything about his birthdad but his birthmom did not mention anything about such and such issue.' As I think to myself 'I don't even know if we had our agency send her an email asking such question if she would respond.'

Don't get me wrong. I am not ashamed Little Man is adopted. It's when all is thrown out the window in trying to diagnosis what may be causing Little Man's stomach pains. It would be wonderful to know his brithdad's heath history. Once when asked a question I answered NO, there is no family history as I was thinking of my family but had to correct myself and state he's adopted. He's my family. Doesn't DNA become the same after the judge says it's official? When friends, family and strangers say Little Man looks so much like daddy doesn't that mean my family history is now his?

That'd be too easy, right? After prayers one night Little Man asked where his birthmom was. I explained I think she's in Wisconsin but maybe one day he can see about finding her. He liked that idea.

I just wish we had a little more contact so we could get more medical history. Especially with his family inherited Keratosis Pilaris.

Joys of Mommyhood

Well I get to have fun this weekend. Little Man has been having tummy issues and abdominal pain the past month or so. I took him to the doctor yesterday and he is going to run some tests which require a poop sample. We tried to see if Little Man would go at the doctor office but that didn't happen. So this weekend I get to go fishing for poo.

There's just one problem. Mr. Independent likes to go to the bathroom without telling us especially when he poops. We have tried to no avail to explain to him how we appreciate him wanting to do things himself this is just one thing he cannot. He knows that the tests will help the doctor find out what is making his tummy hurt.

I'm just not looking forward to fishing. This is part of the mommy duties they don't tell you about. I guess it's in the fine print somewhere.

I better add rubber gloves to my grocery list.

Talking

Little Man and I arrived at S’s house about 8 minutes early yesterday morning.  I didn’t want to intrude so we sat in her driveway.  Little Man got out of his carseat and stood while I turned in my seat so we could chat.  We chatted the whole time.  We talked about snow, cars, trains, why S still has Santa on her roof and how it really isn’t a good idea to climb on a snow covered roof.  We talked about haircut’s and how Malia is the only that should cut his hair (a few weeks ago he took the initiative and cut some of his bangs).  He asked questions and told me what he thought of some things.

 

I really loved listening to what he had to say.  What his thoughts are and how he thinks.  He really is growing up. 

 

This got me thinking about families who don’t talk.  I was watching a rerun of Wife Swap yesterday and they had a family who lived together but it was like they were just roommates.  They ate separately; only passed eachother in the house and hardly spent any time together.  It reminded me of Daddy’s family.  They all could be in the same house but if you didn’t know any better it would seem like they were living alone. 

 

I have a friend whose daughter’s go to daycare with Little Man.  One day we were all leaving and I watched as my friend’s husband put their daughters in their SUV and turned on their individual DVD player hooked to the seat.  This really appalled me. Their daughters are 2 and 4 and what a perfect time for bonding then on the car ride home.  These are precious moments in our kid’s life and before we know it they are going to be in school too busy doing homework, sports, and work.  Why not set the foundation now for communication? 

 

I can only pray that Little Man and I can still talk like this when he is a teenager.  That he knows he can talk to me about anything and ask me anything.   

 

Snow Day!

I declare today Snow Day. Boy is it snowing! I was pretty undecided whether to go into work or not. But the lack of sleep (I was up between 2am and 4am) and raspy voice and sore throat pretty much sealed the deal on me and Little Man staying home. I felt bad as he was going to spend the day with A&B but it's just not worth the risk of driving in the crud so he can have fun. As Daddy put it I would have been in tears driving in it.

I think back to when I was working before we had Little Man and would trudge out and drive in the cruddy weather to get to work. I'd white knuckle it. But now that we have Little Man I tend to think is it really worth our lives? Call me an overly cautious driver but I'd rather use up 8 hours of vacation time and be safe.

Now...I am home, about to pull my hair out and am more than ready to put Little Man and myself down for a nap. And it's not even 10am.

Home

We are HOME. As in the new house. We moved in last Saturday and I want to shout out to all 8 friends who helped. It helped make it go by fast and the company was delightful. There was one mishap, the kitchen table broke. I highly suggest not standing on one. It is fixed and looks just fine. We are slowly finding everything and putting everything in its new place. Pictures are going up and it's starting to feel like home.

I was going to upload the pictures but I have no idea where the cord to the camera is. Hmm.... must find it soon. I already have a ton of pictures I never uploaded so my card is going to be full soon.

We are much closer to our church and I'm loving the straight shot drive to Little Man's babysitters and work. No back tracking for me! Yahoo! It feels good to be back in the area. I really did miss it here. Quiet small town feel but not too far away from the city.

As you can see we have internet (got hooked up today!). We also have cable again and Daddy informed me today he got us DVR. Whoohoo!! I can now DVR shows and watch them in one night.

I'm also excited because we lost the antenna to our TV upstairs. We now have cable up there and I can have the news on in the morning. This is a big deal in the winter with snow. Like with the snow storm going through right now and the last thing I heard it is suppose to drop up to 14 inches by Tuesday. I can watch TV tomorrow and see if it's safe for me to go to work and drop Little Man off at A&B's house (S took the day off. Lucky her!).

Hopefully now I'll be updating this more. Well I'm going to go watch some commercials, and maybe some football too.

T minus one week

Six and a half days until we move. We did our usual Saturday morning grocery run and as we were getting out of the car I told Daddy 'This is the last time we'll have to go up 3 floors to put our groceries away. And hope there's a cart by the elevator.' Which, by the way, there never is. I have lost count how many times I've gone grocery shopping by myself and had to lock the elevator so I could get all the groceries in. I am not going to miss that.

Packing...yeah...that isn't going to good. I have no idea where to start. I've packed our movies and the odds and ends that were on the entertainment center. The kitchen will most likely get packed Wednesday night. That's the last night I have a 'real' meal planned. Thursday will be leftovers (we'll be having rotini with meatballs and twisty bread on Wednesday). Cereal and or toast and eggs on Friday night and Saturday we'll be having pizza at the new house. Daddy has bought paper plates and paper bowls so I'm prepared to pack the bowls right now. Oh and the silverware, he bought plastic spoons, forks, and knives too. I better not enjoy them too much. Eat, throw. I love it! No dishwashing. :)

Today I went to my friend's house and we cut out a train on her Criket machine. We used this wallpaperish type paper (I'm drawing a blank on the name) so I can just peel off the train and stick it to the wall. It'll go in Little Man's room and he is SO excited. It's a locomotive and a caboose. There's also a lantern and crossing sign.

I must go force myself to pack some more. Or maybe I'll dig out a movie and watch it with Daddy.

By the way. Go Vikings!!!

Eleven Days!

We are moving in 11 days!! It's starting to hit me that this is actually happening. We are moving into a HOUSE. More room! Four bedrooms (well 3 are finished)! A basement! A YARD! I was thinking about the move on my way home from work and was thisclose to bawling. I wonder if I'll lose it when we are handed our keys Saturday morning (next Sat, not this Sat).

The packing isn't going so well. I have 2 boxes packed. We have 7 boxes and I'm realizing that isn't enough. Eep! That's including a bunch of boxes still packed. I'm thinking throwing everything in a garbage bag is the way to go. Throw stuff in it, bring it to the house and dump it out. Of course there won't be any breakable stuff in there that'll just be silly.

Little Man just popped his head in (he should be sleeping) and said he doesn't want his room to be dark. Because of the closeness of the livingroom, kitchen, and laundry room it can get quiet loud with the washer and dryer going, dishwasher and the TV so we keep his door mostly shut. I told him with the new house we'll be able to keep his door open more. He wasn't buying it so I also included getting him a nightlight. He wants a Lightening McQueen one. :)

We are meeting the realtor at the house on Sat the 30th at 9am. Daddy is picking up a U-Haul truck at 11am and hopefully we'll be able to get everything in in one trip. Daddy thinks we'll be able to do it. That would be wonderful!! Then Sunday we could scrub out the apartment and not have to worry about doing it during the week and then do our final walk through.

It's coming up fast. And we can't wait!

Time

Time. There are days when time seems to move nice and slow. Like when I wake up and have half an hour before I need to be up and will lay in bed enjoying the quiet. Or when it's a beautiful sunny day, Little Man is napping and I'm sitting on the couch looking out our patio door. Or when it's 2pm during the workday and time seems to have stopped and sometimes to my horror started moving backwards.

Then there are days time just flies by. Little Man is now 3 1/2. Daddy and I will celebrate our 9th wedding anniversary this coming March. It's 7pm and I want to sit and relax before going to bed at 10:30pm but laundry, dishes, cleaning and other mommy jobs call my name and before I know it it's bedtime and I haven't sat down yet.

Time. We have two weeks until we move. It seems like just yesterday I was counting 41 days. Only two very short weeks to pack. A little over three weeks until we have our final walk through. Three weeks until I have to do a major cleaning of the apartment so we can get our deposit back.

This past year has flown. Two new jobs, a new place to live, car and Little Man growing another year older.

We had a guest pastor at church this morning. He was wonderful. He is a teacher at one of our synod's highschool's, St. Croix Lutheran, here in MN. The highschool I graduated from. I caught myself thinking that I hope he's still teaching at SCL when Little Man starts highschool. Then I about passed out, that's in 12 years. Sure seems like a long time but time passes quickly. Twelve years ago I was 19. In college, working full time and praying every night for God to find me 'The One'. Now here 12 years later I have been married for 8 1/2 years, have a 3 1/2 year old son and am living the most wonderful life I could ever imagine.

I'm not going to speed up time and will quit thinking about sending Little Man off to highschool. I think we'll conquer Preschool first.

His folder

While Little Man was napping I started to pack the knick knacks on the entertainment center. One box full and that was enough for me. I decided to go through these stack of papers (Daddy has a tendency of keeping junk mail and fliers) as I knew some of our adoption paperwork could be in there. The papers were on top of the adoption folder I am keeping all our paperwork in and I wanted to make sure it was all in there. I did this mostly for my piece of mind so I know where everything is. Luckily everything is in the folder and good to go. I put the folder on our bed so I can put it with Little Man's folders (yes he has more than one stuffed full of copies of the adoption paperwork, and his adoption degree is in there too) when we move (again so I know where they are) and then it can go in our room (until the adoption is done and if we get more paperwork they can go in there). Little Man's will go in his closet where he'll be able to look at it.

Daddy and I were sitting on the bed talking and Little Man walked in and climbed up onto the bed. He saw the folder and asked what it is. I told him it is the paperwork so we can adopt a baby sister or brother for him (by the way he wants a sister). He looked at the paperwork and me and commented on how orange is a nice color for this paperwork. I told him he has his own folder too. His eyes got big and he got excited. I pointed to our bookshelf and said 'See that blue one? That's yours.' I told him how we had to fill out the same paperwork so we could adopt him and now we are doing it again to adopt a brother or sister.

Most kids get to see their mommy's belly grow and know they have a brother and sister in there. Little Man sees that we are doing the exact same thing as we did to adopt him. (Unlike if we could go the um, you know biological way. Can't explain that whole process to a 3 year old.) I am excited for the day we sit in the court room in Central MN to declare his new baby brother or sister legally a part of our family and have Little Man there watching. Knowing we did the exact same thing for him.

This is all for them.

Packing

I received an email from the realtor on Tuesday asking if we still wanted to move in the weekend of the 30th. YES! I replied back that same day and still haven't heard back. It's 2 weeks to that day and I really hope she replies back soon and we can move in. It'll save on Daddy having to take the whole first week of February off. I really think we can move into the house in 2 days.

We have a lot of stuff still in boxes from when we last moved. I just made the comment to Daddy that I have no idea what is in those boxes and don't plan on finding out until after we move.

I started packing the few picture frames and knick knacks I put on our entertainment center. Luckily it all fit in one box. Next will be the CD's and DVD's. The CD's will be easy as most are still packed and I'll just have to put the few we took out back into the CD box.

There's a pile of Daddy's clothes sitting on the floor from when he went through all his clothes right after we moved. I need to get those to the Goodwill. I can't believe they've been sitting on the floor for almost a year. Ugh.

I plan on taking down the pictures we hung on the walls next week and patching the holes. We don't need to paint (we decided not to paint) but I'll feel better if the holes are patched.

I can't wait until all this packing is done and we are moved in. Then we can clean this place out and bid adieu. We are getting very anxious and excited as the move date moves closer. I don't know if our neighbors know we are moving or what they all seemed to have gotten louder the past few days and it is quite annoying.

This got me thinking

I was watching the news last night. Actually it was NBC Nightly News I was watching. They were doing a story on unemployment. This caught my attention as this has touched alot of our close friends including us. They were talking about how the unemployment rate is now at 10%. What is striking is the reporter doing the story stated many people have given up looking for a job therefore are no longer listed as unemployed. Because of this the numbers may actually be higher than what is being reported. Eek!

The reporter again said this is a major concern in America and for Obama but first we must work on the Health Reform.

Um...I don't know about about you but why don't we put Health Reform aside (not that I agree with it) and work on creating jobs for most of the Americans that are unemployed?

On a roll

Since I'm on a roll and posted twice yesterday I thought why not post again today. Who knows maybe this will get me back into the swing of blogging.

I am trying to think of subjects to write about and right now my mind is a blank. I think because the only thing I can think of is our move and where we were last year. At this time last year we knew we needed to be out of our house. It was a devastating time to us as a family but especially to Daddy. He was the bread winner of the family working hard to support us. Although the economy was on the down swing his job field was hit hard. Work wasn't coming in but the bills kept going out. When your in a situation like that there is only one way to turn. For us it was on our knees hands folded in prayer. Many judged us. Judged our circumstances and formed their own version on what was going on in our family. Even now others still judge. I feel judging is something that should be left to God. What matters is God has taken our family by the hand and lead us through. We knew he would and he did. Now we prepare to move for the 2nd in one year. And God willing the last time.

I love looking back and seeing where God has brought us. From no kids, to having a wonderful and beautiful son. From no job, no house, to 2 wonderful paying jobs, a great babysitter for Little Man (and VERY affordable!), to friends who are always willing to help us out.

My favorite moment to look back on is when I quit my job (of 3 years) back in college with no notice and no job lined up. I was unemployed for 2 weeks (which was a HUGE deal when I was paying my own college tuition with no loans and had 1 year left). I landed a job at a department store and met this great guy. Ten years ago we rang in the new year, 2000, as a couple. Six months later he proposed and nine months later we were married.

You never know where God will lead you.

Testing. I set up my iPhone so I can send messages to my blog. Let's hope this works!

It worked!!

Whoops

So I finally got back into blogging and then we cancelled our cable. So hopefully I'll be blogging more once we move. In 29 more days!! Woot!

I am excited and anxious about our move. Excited that we will have more space and Daddy will be a tad closer to work. Anxious because it will cost a few dollars to move. To top it off Daddy's car didn't start today. I'm really hoping it's the 17 below weather that's the culprit and not the battery.

Life is busy here. Little Man is in love with trains more than ever and still is our non stop talker. We are trying to teach him to eat and do less talking. I don't want it to turn into a negative thing but right now we have deemed supper quiet time because he will talk and talk and not eat. Then his food will be cold and he won't like it and not eat.

My friend has introduced me to a new author Bodie Thoene. I'm on book 3, Munich Signature, in the Zion Covenant series. I highly recommend these books. This serious is about WWII and a Jewish musician, her family, Jewish friends and hidden players who are trying to stop Hitler. I have been reading so much that Little Man is picking up on it and I find him sitting on the floor reading his books. I love it. I have on my wish list when we move to get him his very own bookshelf. Then we can put all his books on there and it can be his very own library. Right now his books are strewn all over the place and sometimes he can't find that one book he wants to 'read'.

I will end here and hopefully I'll be back before we move. If not and you don't hear from me I'm probably running around in circles trying to figure out what to pack first.